"The first step toward acceptance is denial."
What?
Had to reread this a couple of times before it made sense. I had always relegated denial to a negative, useless place where people hid from the truth. I thought insulating with denial was a backwards move. It was my enemy.
The rest of this quote helped me understand:
"The first step toward moving through denial is accepting that we may be in denial, and then gently allowing ourselves to move through."
In this way, denial serves a very valuable purpose. It is a stepping stone to reality. I had never thought of it that way.
So instead of judging denial as being a bad thing, I have decided to try and see it as a necessary part of the process. Instead of the problem it is part of the solution.
Judging things never seems to get me anywhere anyway so here is one more thing I hope to let go!
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Quote from "Letting Go" by Melody Beattie
Jef Gazely on Codependence & How to Develop Healthy Relationships
Jef Gazely- Dysfunctional Families and the Shame Cycle
Check out the Orange County ACA website at: Orange County Adult Children
3 comments:
Understanding about the mechanics behind denial, delusion, self deception and dissociation helps me alot. Along with understanding other ways the ego works.
Learning more about narcissism and NPD helps me understand alot about my self and many that I used not understand at all.
I like Alice Millers book- Drama of The Gifted Child.
The gift was denial-dissociation the bubble that protects in the beginning but then perhaps can destroy in the end.
I still can't belive how many sick and suffering people there are that are still being treated like juvenille delinquents, criminals and misfits of society. They are beingh sent to jails and institutions and treated like aninmals. I feel that type of treatment only usually adds to their problems.
Progress not perfection....the original saying was actually "WE STRIVE for progrees"
Thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts with us, its amazing to read your informative stuff and we hope to know more from you.
Lovely blog yoou have here
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