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Tuesday, February 15, 2011

A Real Life Portrait Of Recovery In Group Therapy

Breaking the cycle: Children of alcoholics: MyFoxBOSTON.com


In honor of National Children of Alcoholics Week, "Together We Heal" is being offered as a free e-book download!

This insightful book follows several ACOAs through their group therapy sessions with author Szifra Birke. You may benefit from their breakthroughs and growth and find connections to your own life.

From the book:

"The people in this book began meeting for group therapy after they learned about how alcoholism and codependency continued to impact their lives—years, even decades, after they had left home. Even if you didn’t grow up in an alcoholic home, you will undoubtedly share many common feelings. Dysfunctional family patterns and unresolved issues that we continue into adulthood are not reserved for families of alcoholics only."


The American Group Psychotherapy Association Journal says:

The volume takes the reader on an in-depth voyage through 15 meetings of a typical ACOA (adult children of alcoholics) group, and introduces us to several real-life patients of the therapist Szifra Birke. The book is coauthored by a patient in this group, and the perspective alternates between that of patient to therapist.

Unlike many self-help books in the addictions field, which offer primarily an educational view of the various roles and dilemmas that ACOAs face, this book allows us to see first-hand those roles played out in a group, and also allows us to see the impact of the group process in altering these roles, which are initially rigid and confining. These roles, such as the scapegoat, the mascot, the family hero and others, are described by the patients themselves as they recall their painful family histories in a benign, somewhat structured environment.


Szifra Birke holds a Master’s Degree from Purdue University and a BA in psychology from Boston University. She is a licensed mental health counselor and a licensed marriage and family therapist.

This limited time download offer ends Feb. 20, 2011.

Here is the download link: "Together We Heal" Free Download

Check out the Orange County ACA website at: Orange County Adult Children

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

"No" Is A Complete Sentence


Struggling To Keep Everyone Happy

I heard it said the other day, "'no' is a complete sentence". The point being that you do not have to explain or make others understand why you can't or don't want to do something. Often, codependency dictates that we make it alright and try to soothe disappointed feelings when we cannot live up to others' expectations.

In fact, "emotional vampires" may use our willingness to please to take advantage of us. They seek to have power and control over us. And as soon as we feel the need to explain, they have it. Saying "no" and just "no" can be difficult and stressful for people pleasers. We hate the thought of hurting other people's feelings or letting them down. But true friends will understand and those who don't are not worthy of our friendship.

Adult Children Of Alcoholics may fear the awkward silence after we have just given a negative response and be tempted to fill it with explanations and regrets. But if we just let it be, things will be ok.


Check out the Orange County ACA website at: Orange County Adult Children